my first Egyptian bar

So tonight it was Eunice's last night in town. Her Egyptian buddy Dena, who she calls "my chain-smoking photographer friend" told her about this concert at the Marriott hotel. This hotel is swanky, their slogan is "authentically palatial" (it used to be a french palace or something). We go in, get directed to Harry's Pub. A pub! In Cairo! Now keep in mind, I solemnly swore off alcohol for my year in Cairo, and last time I was here I was told alcohol was illegal, not to mention Haram (forbidden in Islam). But we ended up in Harry's Pub. This Sudanese-American dude was busting out everything from Bob Marley to 50s soft rock, and then some Arabic music in the interludes.

So I knew I missed bars (I haven't been in one since May), but all of a sudden I almost cried at the familiarity. The dim lighting, the Guinness, the live music, scantily clad (meaning not covering everything but their hands and face, as is encouraged by the prophet Mohammed) people awkwardly dancing, people making out, it was amazing! Granted a Guinness cost approximately $11 (55 pounds), which is pretty freakin steep for Cairo, and excluded me from drinking, even if I hadn't solemnly sworn off it. I felt immediately at home and relaxed, and missed home terribly, where I took bars shamelessly for granted.

However, after some much needed girl chat with my roommates (after spending way too much time with Egyptian men and men in general) I was supremely happy to be in Cairo. Then, Alissa and Eunice's boss at the Arab League showed up with these two extremely gorgeous Russian sisters. I was scared, especially when Alissa made a joke about the cold war... However, they were all the friendliest people ever. These women who appeared to be grouchy, potentially anorexic models ordered two carrot cakes and talked with us for a good while about dancing and the Middle East and studying arabic and how you can make a contribution to the world, and posed for pictures with us. Although I think one of them actually was a model in Milan, the other working in Cairo. This is so weird!!! I'm like this random American just graduated from college and I'm hanging out with these Arab League officials, random Russian models, and in this extremely fancy hotel (Mr. S paid for everything though).

This makes me realize that somehow I will always have privilege. I keep trying to run away from it but even here, I can go almost anywhere I want by virtue of being a foreigner. I can speak to almost anyone in a high position because my native language happens to be English and everyone wants to talk to an American (I guess we're in short supply here). I can get a really decent job by Egyptian standards for the same reason. I can get into almost any country with an American passport, including America. I have a college education. I go across the world where I think my connections and background couldn't possibly give me an advantage, I'm an outsider right? But even as a broke, lazy 21 year old I'm treated like I'm wealthy and powerful. I had the thought suddenly in the lobby of the palatial Marriott, that maybe I'm supposed to stop running from this and use it somehow. What can I use this for? And how will I make sure I don't get caught up in it and actually think I'm better than other people just because I'm treated like I am? Ahh too much responsibility!

My friends inform me that I'm finally growing up, which is part of why I'm here and partly just inevitable but at the same time I just want to be able to enjoy life and stop worrying about who I am and how I can use that and making sure I don't needlessly offend or hurt people in the process of my living and enjoying. And how can I really enjoy myself when there are so many suffering? God wants me to be free and rejoice right but can he want me to rejoice in that freedom if others are still in bondage? Am I really that old yet? Argh. I want to be challenged to live life the right way, and as I told Alissa today, its great being here because you are almost free of temptations. But you are only free of those obvious temptations. The more sinister ones, the ones I am more prone to, they are obviously still here. And I refuse to use my co-worker's constant excuse, "It was the devil! Playing in my head!" (complete with simulated devil horns), as amusing and adorable as it is.